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Home > Ask A Career Coach > I have a job but it's making me feel trapped and depressed

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I have a job but it's making me feel trapped and depressed

Byron K. on April 20, 2012

Career Change, Job Search, Work/Life/Cancer Balance

Greetings,

I have a job but with my cancer (brain tumor - oligodendroglioma stage 2) but I feel extremely stuck.  I have a wife and two kids to support but now I feel as if there is no way I can go anywhere in my career and my job is extremely un-fulfilling.

I am 37 years old and I always wanted to pursue a creative career and to some my job might be considered creative as I do web design.  To me it is like a prison cell.  I am completely at the mercy of my clients and have no input on what I create.  I have become a tool for folks who can't or don't want to know how to use technology.  I feel the same way I did when I was in the Army.  Cancer has become my prison cell.  I am highly prepared and qualified for a creative career but at my position, creative experience is not really regarded in high esteem. 

I am a cog in a machine with a ticking time bomb in my brain.  I write poetry to help with my depression but I truly think working this job makes my situation worse.  I don't think I can mentally handle work.  I am on lots of medications, anti-anxiety, anti-depresion, anti-psychotic all to balance my mood from my anti-seizure meds.

I am not sure what to do.  I'd love to help work for an organization that helps with cancer or environmental causes.  If I could feel my work is helping in some way and that my creative background is respected and utilized I believe I could do it.  Please review my web sites and this post and let me know where I'm going wrong.

Regards,

Byron

www.byronking.com

www.globatron.org




1 Comment

Image of Judi Swedek

Judi Swedek

Apr 21, 2012

Career Coach Comment:

Dear Byron,


I feel your pain. It's so very hard to feel trapped with no way out. I hope you seek out support in this regard.


I love that you want to apply your creativity to something meaningful. In looking at your website, you are extremely creative and have much to offer. Start reaching out to local organizations, even on a volunteer basis, to offer your services. There are also a number of non-profit career sites like idealist.org and nonprofit-jobs.org where you can search for opportunities. Also, ask your doctors and others for organizations. Starting as a volunteer with an organization can open many doors.


Please do take care of yourself and know that in your current role you are creative, even though it may not feel like that to you. At times we need to apply our creativity in other ways, like with your poetry, to balance until we can follow our true passion. Have faith that with outreach to those organizations you would like to work with, the right door will open.


Kind regards,


Judi


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